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Sands of Time

What do you most treasure in your life?

Time flows like sand in an hourglass – it is in our attention zone for such a short time, like a second, and then passes beyond our reach where we cannot change anything that just happened. Yes, we can make changes in future seconds in what is about to happen or is pending.

So, I ask you, where is your focus? What are you thinking about or spending time doing? What do you cherish?

If you answered these questions, then you must ask yourself the next question: How am I spending my time, which is so very precious because once that moment is gone, it cannot be changed? Every day counts. Every choice matters.

Are you working so that you might have more stuff, be it a Gucci bag, a Rolex watch, a new home, or a vacation? Or are you working because you are a solid citizen who pays your bills, but in many instances the incoming moneys are not enough to satisfy the outgoing layout? At what point do you draw the line? In this economy, many people are just surviving, working more than one job, and yet do not have enough to pay for necessities, let alone luxuries like steak. Homelessness of individuals and families is growing in this country because the pay for the available jobs is not enough to rent an apartment, let alone own a place to live. Many are eating the foods they can afford, which are the type that not only add weight but also contribute to extremely poor health.

In short, life happens. Dreams can die if you let them. Possibilities are never realized because every day we jump into the hamster cage, going round and round, with nothing changing.

Einstein said the definition of  insanity is doing something over and over again and expecting a different result.

Time moves faster as one ages. Days fly by, months evaporate, and years come and go. You can look at the past and wonder where it all went and why. Many times it ends up in castigating oneself because of the negative perceptions/expectations unmet/sad remembrances.

So I ask you, where is your focus? Where do you want to put your energies/time/dollars/goals? Your answer is the essence of the choices you make every single day. So I ask again, What do you most treasure in your life? Are you keeping that in mind when you make your choices?  Every act of every minute of the day becomes history, with its impact felt like the ripples that form on the lake when a rock is thrown in.

Time is very, very real. How you spend it – every second of it – really does matter, for one day the sands do run out. There is no turning of the hourglass for you. Do your choices reflect what you want to achieve? If not, a change is required. Are you willing?

God’s blessings on your journey.

Image result for hourglass

Image result for ripples on water

 

The Joy of Life

The Joy of Life is a mysterious thing which you either have, know you have it, and experience it daily if not all the time —  or something has caused it to drain away, leaving you with an empty feeling, knowing not what you have lost.

Have you ever watched a dog that knows it is time to go for a walk? They are wagging all over, tail included. As they walk along, their head is up – unless it is down sniffing around at all the other smells. Their excitement does not lag as they go along, either. They are pulling on their leashes as a rule, and it does not matter what size the dog is.

How long has it been since you experienced the excitement of looking forward to something during your day? It could be something as small as a child’s smile or a small hand holding yours, or it could be meeting a friend or loved one for lunch. The possibilities are endless, aren’t they?

Or are they? Have the daily vicissitudes (wear and tear) worn you down to a nubbin?  Are you so caught up in what you have to do, what has to be done, and know you cannot do it all that your days disappear? It is like a thief in the night, for when you turn around, time seems to have evaporated before your very eyes. You look back over the last few days, or months, or years, and wonder where it all went.

The solution? Pay attention daily, hourly, and by the  minute. Do not let time slip through your fingers like sands in an hourglass.

Be alert! Look for it! Be like the dog who is looking forward to going for a walk. Be enthusiastic! When was the last time you “wagged your tail” over something you wanted to do?

Life comes to us in the present — not tomorrow or yesterday or even five minutes ago. It is the very second you are reading this, only to slip away into the past. What choices you make NOW do make a difference!

Do you have a dream that has dissipated into a ghost of its former self? DREAMS and GOALS help us to achieve more than we deemed possible, because SYNERGY comes into play. When was the last time you thought about your DREAMS or GOALS as a possibility/probability? Have you shelved them as improbable? You shoot yourself down before anyone else has a chance to do it! Perhaps you think you are too old? Too young? Do not have enough money? Do not have any time for such foolishness?

Any step you could take to achieve these dreams and goals is NEVER TOO SMALL! If you would take the step you see, it will lead you on…just like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz did in the “Follow the Yellow Brick Road!” Along the way (where she tried to get back home), she was accompanied by Toto, her little dog, and then the Scarecrow (without a Brain), a Tin Man (without a heart), and the Cowardly Lion (without a medal). The Wizard of Oz  came up with a solution, which worked for him just fine. It took the Good Witch of the North to show her that the Red Slippers could take her home if she just thought correctly. Ideas are like that as well.  If you have the courage to begin it, life unfolds before you like a flower. Yes, you may have to pay in time and effort, but think of the fun you could have along the way!

Each day should be like a banquet, with the table spread before you containing all you could enjoy. What would your table look like? What do you want from life? Is mere existence enough, with one day melting into all the others along the way? Or do you want more? Define it. Write it down. Think about it. What step would begin it?

The Joy of Life is not afar off. It awaits you…with every choice you make today. Are you willing?

God’s blessings upon your journey!

 

The Picture of Alert/Excitement

Picture of Alert/Excitement

Dancing for a Treat

Dancing for a Treat

Having fun with paper

Having Fun, Playing with Paper

 

 

Perfectionism

Is there such a thing as a PERFECT WORLD? Somewhere, is there a UTOPIA? Or is it just an IMPOSSIBLE DREAM?

There are people who actually must believe that MISTAKES never happen. I do not think they know that erasers are still put on pencils because they do.

I have had to learn how to deal with my Perfectionism. I have had to modify it so I can live on this planet. I have had to come to peace in my mind that I need to soften my expectations.  In my mind’s eye, I have to aim at an area the size of a washtub instead of a little tiny hole, which is the absolutism of Perfectionism, like in playing golf. I have to give myself some “wiggle room.” If one is dealing with a child, one expects a child to wiggle and get off course a bit. Yet we deny ourselves that possibility. Why is that?

Do we have an Authority Figure between our ears who dictates to us and beats us up inside if PERFECTION is not accomplished? Every single time? In every instance?

Yes, Perfect can be a possibility some of the time. But I need to remind myself that my goals need to be adjusted according to the requirements. If one is programming the course of a rocket or a space module, PERFECT is absolutely required with no room for error. However, for most things on this planet, CLOSE can work rather well.

For one thing, PERFECT takes a lot of time and effort. I have to ask myself if the goal is worth it. Sometimes, it is. However, most of the time, it really isn’t. I always try to do the best job I can, using as much effort as I can to do something right the first time. I don’t intentionally make mistakes that require something to be redone. However, as with all humans, sometimes it does happen to all of us.

The question is, do we want to become paranoid because we are less than perfect and may make a mistake?

That translates into fear, which incapacitates the mind and disables the functioning capability which is part of our innate system.

Life is like archery: one learns how to shoot the arrow the best one can, one takes aim, and then one releases the arrow towards the target, win, lose or draw. Once released, its trajectory cannot be altered unless it hits an obstruction, like a branch. The end results tell the tale. Once one releases the arrow, angst about where it will hit will not change the arrow’s trajectory.

Yet, in real life, we add the angst every single moment over every little detail. This angst is bad for our physical health, our mind, and our body. It registers as higher blood pressure, a sense of nervousness, the “fight or flight” message to our adrenal glands, etc. It can cause us to make poor choices of food and other behaviors, eating or smoking to calm ourselves down.

Are you willing to give yourself some “wiggle room?” Can you adjust your expectations so that you can opt for PERFECT or CLOSE, as needed? Can you forgive yourself for MISTAKES and move on?

Just a note in passing: Procrastination ALWAYS has an element of PERFECTIONISM in it, causing you to delay acting at all. That is worth thinking about.

You are the only one who is at the helm of your ship. How will you sail it? Where will you sail it? What is your destination? Are you enjoying your journey? Only you can decide these things.

God’s blessing be upon you!

Living in the Now

This is a phrase that is used by many people for numerous reasons. We would all agree that, whatever form it is in, it is a good idea.

But what does it really mean? It may seem self-explanatory and rather simple. However, as with all things that sound simple, in reality it can get very complicated in a hurry when one tries to use it in everyday life.

Circumstances may appear rather easy in the beginning of each day. You know you have certain things that will occur that day. So you begin your day. Your boss changes his mind on a due date for a project and gives you half the time to do your portion. This will require a lot of your personal time — perhaps even working at home — to do what is asked of you. That will bump your work out session, a date with your important other, and forget the time to cook that healthy meal you were planning in lieu of grabbing something on the run. This happens in many ways to every one of us. We start out one way, only to have to reverse directions and go another way. Our priorities change constantly during any given day. So, the question arises: How can I Live in the Now?

Life takes planning, both short and long term, in order to feel like we are in control of our time and destinies. It takes money, goals and cooperation from others, which they may or may not provide.

We must maintain our awareness of the above paragraph when we are busy with our daily lives and priorities. Otherwise, we arrive at a point where a long-dreamed-of goal is supposed to be achieved, only to find that it got lost in the cacophony which has occurred in the meantime.

So, how do we stay on track, Live in the Now, without sacrificing our planning? It is like deciding to take a journey by car. You get out the maps in order to decide the best routes to your destination (ignoring GPS in this example), you check out your vehicle to be sure it is safe for a trip, you pack your bags, and you get underway, following your template. You know there will be road construction (obstacles), traffic, accidents, etc., along the way. Yet you choose to keep going, mile by mile, until you reach your destination.

Living in the Now is just like that road trip. Moment by moment, you begin it. You know how you want to get there, when, and with whom. You take in the information that is coming to you through all of your senses, analyze it, and then see how it fits into your “road trip.” This all happens with lightning speed at both your subconscious and conscious levels. If you have an established template, you have more stability, enabling you to adapt to conditions on the fly. At the end of your day, you will be able to look back on your accomplishments despite the obstacles and happenstance occurrences. You will have positive feelings about yourself and others. You will have energy to proceed into your evening and enjoy life more. The daily wear and tear will have occurred to you as well, but you will have been proactive, resolving each instance as it appears to the best of your ability. You will feel like you are LIVING your life.

However, many of us do not make a template. Whichever way the winds blow (and sometimes the winds can be pretty horrendous!), it blows that person hither and yon. (The demands of daily living are the winds.) At the end of that day, that person will be exhausted, will feel like the day “just got away” from them, and will be embroiled in the negative emotions generated by being out of control of the time and the day. He/she will just drop on the couch when finally arriving home, with no thought given to anything other than the daily essentials. This person will be EXISTING. Procrastination would be the way of operating, creating more ill feelings to wreck havoc on the spirit.

The daily vicissitudes (wear and tear) take their toll on all of us. The only question is: Do you want to LIVE or EXIST?

I, for one, choose to LIVE in the NOW. There is always more to be done in a day than I can possibly accomplish. Yet I am enthusiastic about seeing a beautiful butterfly or flowers, watching a Sand Sculpture Contest to see how creative adults can still be, or looking at children playing — always a joy. When the daily vicissitudes come, as they always do, it is my attitude which makes a difference. It has been said that, when life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Yet, how many of us can do that? Not many. We REACT in lieu of ACT, we look at the negative side of the situation first, and then we “blow our cork!” Is this beneficial? Does it solve anything? Not likely. By changing my choices, electing to form a template for my day, deciding my destination, and be positive and SMILE — the rest of the day eventually takes care of itself. Things happen or don’t happen. I run into my obstacles, examine them assiduously, see what can be done or not, and move on. It is like a waltz, where your center of balance is over your feet. If someone or something is always pulling you off balance, how can you dance? It is your job to maintain your balance. No one can do it for you. Your attitudes, decisions, and priorities will run your day for good or ill.

If you are the Captain of your ship, with your hand on the helm, you alone can decide where the winds will take you. Take your hands off the helm, and watch where the winds carry you. You are a powerful person, able to decide this: Do you want to LIVE or EXIST? Do you want to REACT or ACT? Do you want to be positive or negative? Where is your center of balance? It is your CHOICE. If, through inaction and procrastination, you do not make a choice, it will be made for you. The winds will take over, I can assure you. What do you want?

Beautiful Butterfly

Beautiful Butterfly

Cactus Blossoms

Cactus Blossoms

Sand Sculptures

Sand Sculptures

Sand Sculptures

Sand Sculptures

Playing in the Sand

Playing in the Sand

Children Playing

Children Playing

Having Fun with her Daddy

Having Fun with her Daddy