Blog Archives

Dealing With Sickness

Sometimes, out of the middle of nowhere, a health issue pops up. Sometimes it is serious, sometimes not. But whether it is serious or not, it always messes with your mind, attitudes, and emotions. How do you get through it?

It is not an issue of wimping out, having a pity party, or giving up. As long as you are alive, you have to deal with it. How you do that is up to you and nobody else. What does your mind say? What attitudes do you choose to encourage? What emotions do you endure?

Common attitudes vary from looking on the bright side, taking your courage in hand, and do what you have to do to get better, whatever that consists of…be it physical therapy – doing it with a good effort, knowing that what you put in will determine how well it works – take your prescribed medication as you should – change of diet, either temporarily or permanently – asking for help when needed, even if you are independent-minded and do not want to ask – make a list of questions for your physicians – listening to their answers – in short: Doing whatever it takes to achieve your goal of improving and getting better.

Looking on the other side of attitudes, you see an unwillingness to go through the pain of it all, be it exercises from physical therapists,  uncomfortable tests for evaluation, unwillingness to trust your physicians or their advice, inability to cope with it all so you withdraw and do nothing (which is an option, though not a very wise one), just hoping that somebody out there has a magic pill to make it all go away.

So far, I have not found any magic pills. Have you?

I cannot wave a magic wand and make the problems disappear, never to return.

The emotions you deal with can exacerbate an already tough situation, as can your brain. Fear immobilizes – always! Anger is debilitating. (Yes, anger is a component, more than we like to admit.) It can even be a generic anger that this has happened to you.  It is all inside of you, bubbling away like a witch’s brew.

Knowing the cause – be it an accident, exposure to a sickness, or just a problem with your body – rarely helps.

Somehow, you need to find a way that works for you personally. You must seek help to resolve the thoughts, emotions, and attitudes. Books can aid you. Counseling can, too. Venting with a good friend can come to your assistance. Prayers for me are a vital part of it all, requesting them from caring family and friends I know.

When it is a loved one who is ill, it becomes a lot more complicated. Feelings of hopelessness and helplessness come unbidden as you watch them suffer. You might be able to paste on that smile while you are in their presence, trying to help where you can, but when you are alone, it can fill your heart with angst and fear. You are not in control of anything. That is when you have to do the same thing as listed above: Get yourself under control. You cannot be of assistance to anybody if you don’t calm yourself first.

I know dear people who are caught in the horns of this dilemma. Denial causes inappropriate reactions, delaying resolution – sometimes permanently – as the condition continues to deteriorate.

It has been said: “The way out is the way through!”

I believe this from the very bottom of my heart. There is no avoiding it. You just have to ask yourself: How am I going to respond to this situation? Examine your thoughts, feelings, attitudes, and emotions. They are as important as the symptoms of the illness. You are a whole person, not just an arm, leg, heart, head, or other body part.

With that in mind, perhaps you could start by making a list of them. Then you can look for ways to resolve each one. There is no evading this issue, so deal with it.

The question is: Are you willing? Do you want to look for a resolution? It is within your purview to do it – and you are the only one who can. The problem is well defined. Now look for the answer.

God’s blessings on your journey!

 

 

 

Having a Pity Party?

Pity Parties prevail, unfortunately. There are so many reasons to stay in one permanently. Would that do any good? Not likely.

In one of Og Mandino’s lectures, he said, “When I feel sorry for myself, and I don’t want to enter the world…I open the paper to the obituaries to see how many would trade places with me if they only could.”

Now that is definitely something to ponder.

He also said, “Never treat time as if you had an unlimited supply. No one has a contract with life.”

If you were to take a census of your prevailing attitudes, what would you say they were? If they center on a Pity Party, you have to know that direction will lead you nowhere. Are you willing to take a close look at the words you speak, the emotions you feel, and the ways you act? What is your body language saying? Can you look into a mirror and look closely at your eyes and your facial expression? What story are they telling you?

When you are depressed, one of the harder things you can do is to look into your eyes in a mirror and gaze upon your countenance. Why? Your eyes are downcast, for one thing. You are sad, your shoulders sag, and your head hangs down.

Did you know that depression is actually unexpressed anger turned inwards? Note I said, “Unexpressed.” I don’t mean you need to put your fist through a wall or hit something or somebody. There are many constructive ways to work on anger, such as working out, hitting a pillow, writing it all down on a sheet of paper and then shredding it, releasing it.

The point of a Pity Party is that you want to feel better. So, if you stay in one long enough, you should feel better, right? Nope, never going to happen. It perpetuates itself.

The only way to get out of a Pity Party is to change your focus from whatever is driving you crazy. You need to find something else to think about. Hopefully you will find something beautiful to contemplate, look at a rainbow, or listen to music. Many things can lift your spirit, from a good massage or warm bath to a quiet walk in nature. You just have to find something that works for you.

Again, it is in your capable hands to find a different way to express yourself. Are you willing to try that?

%d bloggers like this: